It’s all those things, and much, much more, because it’s defined by manifestations of human activity regarded in the collective.īasically, things become gay because you are gay and you are doing them. What is it? Is it memes? Is it language? Is it wearing a bonnet and signing your name on the Devil’s Leger in Puritan New England? Yes. First, you should know that gay culture isn’t real. You’re not doing anything wrong and if anyone tells you different you let me know and I’ll come to school myself and tell them off.Īlso, can we talk about how iconic you are for telling your hometown that you never went outside as a kid and that’s why they never saw you? You deserve to be answering people’s letters, not me! You have some things figured out that the rest of us don’t, tbh.īut on the subject of feeling out of the loop when it comes to “gay culture,” I do think I can be of some help. You dropping Katy Perry and Will & Grace as current gay cultural references in this letter tells me that it’s our job to protect you. I'm basically someone who's been described as "Judas Priest gay.” Is there something I'm missing that's supposed to help me enjoy these things? Does this sound like a matter of preferring documentaries over other genres? Or is this just not as uncommon as I probably think? I've tried watching Sex and the City only to wonder if I'm supposed to like any of the characters. I simply cannot even pretend I like Katy Perry or Will & Grace. And while I'm not too familiar with the history of the Pride movement, I would love to learn more about it.īut that's about the extent of it.
I feel a certain glee when characters in fiction I already like turn out to be LGBTQ. This makes talking about my childhood awkward unless I just say "my parents grew up in the city so we didn't really do a lot of outdoorsy stuff.” It's true without being too detailed, so that response is usually enough to get some pressure off me.Īnyway, I don't really have much interest in certain things considered part of "gay culture.” I watch Drag Race and follow some past contestants on social media.
I also live in a fairly small and conservative town. I'm a gay transgender man, though I tend to keep the "transgender" part under wraps most of the time. If you need advice, send him a question at Welcome to ¡Hola Papi!, the advice column where John Paul Brammer helps people work through their anxieties, fears, and life's queerest questions.